texture

i am convinced that my love for food stems from texture. flavor - that's a given. seasonality - that's a must. but when you can combine different textures to create one cohesive plate - well, that's amore!

think about it...who likes yogurt without some type of fruit, nut, or granola mixed into it? or a puree without an accompanying piece of bread for dipping? and who can stand a hot cocoa without a fluffy dollop of whipped cream and crispy biscotti? surely, not i. it's all about texture.

last night, i shared the loveliest dinner at lucques in west hollywood. aside from the textures that made up the ambience - exposed brick walls, wooden beamed ceilings, soft candlelight - i was absolutely smitten with the textures meeting my palate...

starter: citrus salad with avocado and pistachios.
main: roasted winter vegetables with saffron cous cous and ginger-mint chutney.
dessert: vanilla panna cotta with roasted dates, pistachio brittle and tangerine sorbet.


wow! there was nothing more delightful than orchestrating each bite ever so tactfully. each ingredient's texture so beautiful on its own, but contributing to an overall masterpiece when arranged with the others. this meal epitomized what i value in all meals: tender loving care. may it reflect the layers of everyday life!

24

birthdays. i find that the older i get, the more excited i am to celebrate my birthday. i think this excitement all started when i lived in the humble abode with abby and emma. the timing of my birthday was perfect - a few weeks into the new quarter, it was an excuse to assemble our creative forces, hand-make invitations, bring everyone together, and celebrate friendship. and yummy treats. abby and emma always made that day effortlessly special.

sadly, birthdays at the abode are no more since everyone is conquering post-college life around the world. although i miss those birthdays with such wonderful company, i am excited about this one. 24. but why? why 24? after days spent trying to answer this question, i've come up with a list. yes, a list.

24...
    --is the first year i'm out of school. an adult.
    --is the year my dreams are being realized.
    --is the year before 25, which is a quarter-of-a-century old.
    --doesn't sound like one of those awkward years - 17, 19, 22.
    --is the age my parents got married. and although i am NOWHERE near the slightest inkling of such  commitment, it's always a joy to think about how far  my parents have come. together.

so as the final countdown begins for the big day, i look forward to reflecting on 23, to celebrating in the comfort of food and friends, and to welcoming another year of a blessed life.

celebration

in celebration of mama completing chemotherapy - welcoming an enlivened spirit in a new body - she and i took some downtime for a mini getaway. a much needed getaway to a bed and breakfast in santa barbara. it was a blessed trip seeing the glimmer in mama's eyes, hearing her laugh from deep within, watching her sleep in uninhibited peace and wake with incessant energy. as always, i am inspired by this woman. she is a fresh breath of life, a woman whose mission is to live and whose instinct is to love.

happy birthday, mama. looking forward to many more "travels with charlie."

meet charlie

i am pleased to introduce the newest addition to my family: charlie. after months of family planning - contemplating the financial and emotional responsibilities of bringing home a new one - i did it. i placed all hesitation and apprehension in my back pocket, and embraced the role as a caregiver. lady spread her wings ever so gracefully, reassuring me that my relationship with charlie is bound to be as special.

as overjoyed as i feel right now, i must confess that i wasn't deplete of birth pains. decision after decision, signature after signature, i was reminded of the commitment associated with new parenthood. 

but once i set eyes on charlie, my plans (waiting for the "perfect time") and expectations (brown or green with white top) were gone. i felt charlie. i knew him. i was ready to bring him home. 

at the end of the day, i feel right about charlie at this time in my life...transitioning into a woman with immense faith for the future. i don't know what will come or where i will be. all i am absolutely sure of is that it's going to be a sweet ride.

committed

june 5, 2011. san diego, ca. the rock-n-roll marathon and half-marathon. i can officially say that i will be running my first half-marathon!

this is something i've been wanting to experience for quite some time. however, as much as i love to run - to traverse the trails and feel the rhythm of my body - i always found excuses to postpone participating in a marathon. school, no time to train. winter, poor weather to be outside. first-timer, i'll look like a fool. and then the commitment - to a runner's diet, intervals, extending my runs day by day.

there's something about the safety of being committed that seems so dangerous. threatening. i've found myself seeking the trenches in the midst of an inner battle. but it's interesting because the only thing i've been hiding from has been myself. commitment.


i realized that in order for me to live a life fulfilled, i must believe that commitment is a channel for the evolution of my desires. and that by being committed, my focus can be re-directed to what's before me - a meaningful reality - rather than those threatening fears and self-doubts.

so i did it. i left the trenches and registered for the half-marathon. and in so doing, i committed myself to challenging runs, to intentional rest days, and to wearing my bib proudly as i cross that finishing line.

come as you are

santa monica power yoga. classes every day of the week, at all hours of the day. donation-based. open to mantra-chanting yogis and the entirely inflexible alike. no age limits. no pre-requisites. just you. anyone. the only rules: turn your cell phone off, remove our shoes at the front, deep breathe, and be. be present.

with the intentional freedom characteristic of this place, i know i belong. i can come, as stiff and inelastic as i am, and release. let go. my breathing can be uncoordinated.  my eyes can wander while others' are closed. when the instructor prefaces that you can go into child's position whenever you need a break, i feel absolutely okay staying in that position for as long as i want. for once, i don't have to perform.

and that's exactly what i love about santa monica power yoga...it's real. its intention is uninhibited. unconditional. when i'm there, i feel like i'm being embraced so tightly that i hear the slightest of whispers: forget about everything. this is your time. don't worry about your unfortunate lack of agility. please, just come as you are. 

better

some things in life require a little more effort. a little more time. a pinch of thought and an ounce of tender loving care...just so they can be better. i've been thinking about these things lately, as i realize how much "better" - sweeter - my life has been with simple touches of sincerity. care.

i have complete faith that my heart has been instilled with the appreciation for some things more than others, that i've been blessed with the resources to live a simple yet full life. so what exactly is worth the extra thought to live this full life? this better life?

  - hand-written letters rather than texting
  - books with pages, as opposed to the ipad, kindle, or other electronic wannabe
  - locally grown produce from the farmer's market over imported grocery store selections
  - treats from a bakeshop, not a package. and better yet, treats baked from a sweet friend
  - live plants rather than plastic
  - running outside rather than on a treadmill
  - charcoal over gas
  - brewing tea leaves as opposed to bags
  - eating together, not alone

one might disagree with which i attribute a rich life. and that's okay! my hope is that that person considers what can make his life better. what resources he has been blessed with. and how he can sacrifice a little time and care to allow those things to become a part of his everyday.

...but if i can be so honest, hand-written letters really are worth it!

regular

while lunching with a dear friend today, it came up again: the notion that i am a regular. it's something i've come to accept, something i giggle away with every familiar encounter. if i am honest with myself, then i must acknowledge that being true to my character means being a regular. and what's wrong with that? i know what i like and i know what i want, so why not enjoy? sure, i crave adventure and surprise, relinquishing my control to embrace the unexpected. but i certainly cannot deny my routine. my favorites. my comfort.

i am safe as a regular. i am part of a family, coming home for reassurance. and as much as i love discovery, i am quite content with the habitual.

so if you ever question the extent of your regularity, here's a scale using some of my examples. if you can relate to most of these, then well done! you're on your way to the ranking of "extremely regular, on the verge of becoming an employee"...

you know if you're a regular if...


  --the fishmonger, baker, and cashiers at whole foods ask how work is going
  --the barista at peet's pours hot water into a cup before you order your tea
  --the employees at urth call you by your name and tell you to say hi to your mom for them
  --the girls at susie cakes ask: "center-cut brownie today?"
  --the server at coral tree shows you pictures of his new baby on his phone
  --the runners on the trail wave to you as if you were a good ol' chum
  --the manager has attempted to keep your favorite table by the fireplace open...especially if emma is with you

you may believe this is ridiculous. crazy. insignificant, even. but i believe this is home.

'tis a new year

i've never been one to make new year's resolutions for two reasons. first, why wait until january 1st to change something, begin something, end something, try something, etc? and second, some resolutions run the risk of disappointment. feelings of failure. hope for months to go by so a new year can begin again...with another resolution. 

but this year is different. for me, it marks a full year of firsts: first year out of school. first year with a career. first year through which i'm discovering myself as an adult. a woman. with this new year, i believe it is appropriate for me to acknowledge my goals - my resolutions - if you will. but i must note that these can happen at any time, any year, and with absolutely no room for disappointment. simply said, they are the "spices" that will deepen the flavors of the day.

in 2011 and in every year that follows, i resolve to...

  -- see more cities.

  -- try more dishes.

  -- dance more often.

  -- eat more meals in good company.

  -- get lost in more books.

  -- and just be present. find the rhythm and slow down. find it, slow it, and enjoy the people i love.

i have a feeling it's going to be a good year...a truly blessed year.